Truth Telling

I am good at lying to myself.   I didn’t think I was being “that” bad with my diet.   I’ve dialed it in this week – watched my carbs, been drinking water, getting the protein and fats in, avoiding gluten like the plague, and eating plenty.   Result – since Monday I’ve dropped about 7 pounds.   I get that most of that is water weight but that tells me that even though I thought I wasn’t being “that” bad, I’d let the carbs back in.  My body responded as soon as I dialed it back in.

I’m three weeks away from my one year anniversary of ending physical therapy.  On Tuesday we were doing four sets of five of Snatch Sots Press –  I started with a PVC bar, then a 15 lb bar, then 25 lbs, 35 lbs (too heavy) and back down to 30 lbs.  My former physical therapist turned coach is watching me and says, “Who would have EVER thought you’d be able to do THAT!   That takes a tremendous amount of leg strength”  There is still a part of me that uses his knowledge as a crutch and wants to ask “didn’t you, why did you ask me to do this if you didn’t think I could do it? What?  I didn’t know that this would surprise you.”  There is also a part of me that goes “Hurrah!, I did it!”  Plus its always fun to surprise people, particularly myself.   A year ago, I could do squats but I hated every single one of them.  I still dislike squats, but I don’t hate them anymore.   Monday’s WOD included toes to bar and did 35 or so of them.  It wasn’t that long ago when I couldn’t do those at all.  Last night was power cleans and snatches.   20 minute workout of every minute on the minute – power cleaned 3,825 lbs and snatched 2,750 lbs for a total of 6,575 lbs – or an average of 328 lbs a minute.  I’m pretty sure if you had told me a year ago that I’d be doing something like that I would have thought you insane.

Monday’s WOD also included sets of 15 wallballs.   I made it through the first 75 wallballs before Gaby got tired and PT yelled at me about allowing her to get lazy as I got fatigued and not to let it.  I’d rather do the movement correctly and I’m glad he told me I was letting Gaby be lazy because I wasn’t aware of it.  But I mentally kind of quit that last round and I’m not particularly proud of it.   I had a little mental meltdown  of frustration and crashed.  It was the same workout as successfully completing 35 toes to bar and I’m pissy after doing 75 wallballs because of a limp?  Wow, I should know better than to bring my ego into the door.  I’m almost always last and the reality is that I’m almost always a  hot sweaty mess. And I melt down when my limp comes back.   Next time, I’ll own the frickin’ wallballs. 

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